Week 10 Journal PSYC 1300-004

Why do people drop out of college? Why would anyone sacrifice their education and their future? Why, why, why?

This question has been pondered, discussed, and dissected over the years by counselors, educators, and parents alike. There really is not a single, concrete answer.

Life happens, things happen, plans (however well constructed) change. Sometimes things are just out of our control. Sometimes things become too much to bear.

No, this is not a cry for help, I am most definitely not considering dropping out of school, but I have been there before, I have made these tough decisions and I am hoping to shed some light on the reasons why students drop out.

I see it everyday at my desk, a student comes in and says they want to drop all their classes, we are trained to talk them through their options, not ask why or tell them that it is a terrible idea. We are there for support, to help them realize the resources available to them, and to help them understand the future repercussions of dropping their classes (financial aid, completion rate, etc).

In that moment, I wonder what could be happening in this persons life to make them feel like they cannot succeed in their classes, are they overwhelmed by the course load? Perhaps they have had a change in their work schedule, or family structure. Maybe they just don't think college is for them. The makeup of this population is also interesting, it is either very young, first time in college students, or the middle aged population who are trying to balance full time work, family, and school. I rarely see people my age (mid-late twenties) dropping out.

My dorm room!

Personally, I was there. I was that student who feels like they cannot succeed and they have no options left. My first experience in college, I was living in a dorm room, far from home, with no roommate and a bad, bad case of stomach issues and anxiety to boot. I lasted 3 days, I never even made it to my Thursday Algebra class. I was ashamed and upset that I couldn't last. To be fair, I did have a debilitating stomach problem that made it very difficult to eat the food on campus and sit in the classroom. But I also felt as though I had not been adequately prepared for this massive upheaval in my life, which I'm sure only accelerated my sickness. Everything I had known for 18 years changed over the course of a weekend and I found myself standing in the doorway of an unfamiliar building waving goodbye as my family drove away. I felt sad, helpless, and alone. I did not yearn for the experience of being away from my family, partying, and living it up at college, as many of my peers did, I just wanted to stay the same.

Looking back, as a student about to graduate, while I am still slightly embarrassed by my "college sleepover" as I will call it, I feel as though it made me a better student in the long run and helped me realize that I would rather live at home and commute than be on my own. I have a lot of friends who loved their college experience, I love my experience too, but in a different way. But hey, that's okay.

Week 8 Journal PSYC 1300-004

Standing up for yourself in academics is similar to standing up for yourself in a workplace environment. If you've never had a job, perhaps you can compare it to standing up for yourself in a large group of people whom you don't know very well.

Standing up for yourself can be pretty terrifying, especially if you are not the confrontational type. HOWEVER, this is my plea to you: learn how to speak up and say how you feel. Here and now is the time to do so because once you get into the "real world" this particular skill can be invaluable.

It took me a few years to realize how important it was to ask questions and demand answers, to not just slink back into the corner and accept what I got. People value my opinion and look to me for answers because they know that I am straight forward and honest.

When I get an exam back and I see a question that I was marked incorrect on but feel as though I should have been right, I will talk to the professor and explain why I answered that way. I have found that most times I will be given partial credit because I was able to say, "Hey look, I was marked incorrect but can I explain why I answered like this?"

I have had the same thing occur with papers, presentations, group projects, and even in my job. Never think that your question is stupid because it's NOT. The only stupid question is the one that you didn't give a chance to be answered.

If you have received a lower grade than you thought was fair, you should always talk to your professor, but remember to keep a level head and hold back your emotions. The same rules apply in the workplace. I had a coworker once tell me, "When you're here working, you are business, you are the face of this office. If you need to, go out to your car and let it all out, scream and cry. But never allow yourself to show emotion in front of others at work because they feed on it, like a cancer." She was absolutely right.


Even though you may be upset and frustrated, never let that emotion rule you, especially if you are meeting with a professor or a boss. Personally, I find that if I am having to make a point and if it is a touchy subject, one that is sure to make me emotional, I will go into the situation with an actual list of bullet pointed reasons behind why I am there in the first place.

You really only get one life and one chance to make it count. Don't ever discount yourself, your ideas, beliefs, hopes, wants, dreams, or work. If you feel as though you aren't being given a fair shot, SAY SO, no one else is going to stand up for you in the real world.

-Kelly

Unrelated to School

This is my first post that I have done that is unrelated to the original purpose that this blog was meant to serve.

I think over the past week or so, since my birthday, I have really begun to realize how quickly time seems to pass.

For example, I was just looking at facebook and stumbled across the profile of a girl I used to babysit while in high school and she is now about to graduate high school herself. I flipped through her photos and saw her younger brother and sisters and realized that the youngest is now TEN YEARS OLD! Wow, time certainly has FLOWN by.

I look back on the last ten years of my own life and struggle to think of moments that stand out to me as  substantial and life-changing. I cannot come up with more than three.

I promised myself on my birthday that I would live this life with more freedom and say yes to things I normally would not. I live my life in a bubble and my hope is to bring myself out of my comfort zone.

I had this plan for what I call "My Great Adventure." Where I was to take Christmas Break and drive across the country. Those plans were cut down though when I learned that I was going to be working until December 20th and I have orientation for Southwestern on January 10th.

I was hoping to drive from Austin to Baton Rouge and stay a night with a friend who goes to LSU Law School then make it to Gainesville, FL to be with my family for a weekend or so to celebrate my Uncle George and his life after his recent passing. After that my plan was to drive up the East Coast and to see my grandparents in Maryland then make my way to my parents house in New Jersey.

I wanted to make the trip to prove to myself that I am capable of doing things on my own. I have always been a homebody and I am sad to say that I regret not going out more and having more friends throughout college. Sure, it has paid off in the way of grades, but when I look back, that is all I can say I have achieved. Do I want my life to be like a corny coming of age movie? No, but I do spend a lot of time thinking about what could have been.

From here on out, this blog as my witness, I hereby swear to put myself out there more. Say yes to the opportunities that come my way, especially if they put me outside of my comfort zone. And most importantly, live my life like I have been afraid to live it.


-Kelly out!